My husband’s parents, Bill and Ruth.
Peter’s father passed on Sunday after a long, brave battle with Parkinson’s. He was a husband, father, grandfather, Chemist, Photographer, and a kind, noble gentleman. I love this photo of Bill and Ruth – it’s filled with youth and love…and the promise of their bountiful future together. They were married 57 years. Raised four children. Even in the very last moment, Bill and Ruth were together. Side by side, in their home. Ruth tirelessly cared for Bill day and night, until his very last breath. I greatly admire their love and dedication. Day after day, year after year, they honored one other, during the good times and not-so-good that comes along in life.
The word Grace keeps coming to mind.
Our youngest daughter’s middle name is Grace, which my husband loved because of its Biblical meaning. I have to confess, aside from naming our sweet little one, I’ve never really given deep thought to the word Grace. Until one chilly January morning this year. Our family was having breakfast at a hotel in Columbus, Georgia. We were making our journey from the Atlanta airport back to the beach. Groggy eyed and hovering over my cup of lukewarm coffee, I couldn’t help but overhear a conversation from two servers calling 2012 “the year of Grace.” One was explaining to the other that her minister told them in a church service that the numbers in 2012 added up to 5, which in the Bible, represents God’s Grace.
“How sweet,” I thought to myself, and went back to sipping my nearly cold coffee.
But a small, still voice inside of me said “Seleta, pay attention.”
Reluctantly, I inched my way a little closer to the two women talking and sheepishly asked if they could tell me more. I felt really stupid. Here I was, this scrappy white girl in glasses eavesdropping on two ladies having an intimate chat. But I was greeted with kindness. In a matter-of-fact tone, the one lady told me that her minister explained that God’s Grace establishes, strengthens, and settles our hearts after we’ve been wounded in any way. Her brown eyes stared heavily into mine when she said, “Grace is the love that pours from God’s heart.” She spoke to me as if we had been friends for years. I realized I needed this message. I thanked her and felt a warm surge fill my spirit.
To this day I’m so grateful to the kind women who stopped and took a moment to tell me more about Grace. I even made a little graphic as a reminder.
Seven months later, I’ve learned that Grace also means growth. And I can’t sit here and tell you growth is always fun. It seems this year has brought a few trying experiences. Ones that insisted we grow and develop more faith. I’ve learned that in each experience there is a lesson…and an opportunity to grow in faith. Instead of sinking or giving up, I’ve tried to stop and think about the lesson. And to find God’s Grace, which is always neatly tucked inside like a precious gift.
Monday was my birthday. Peter was in Atlanta with his mother and siblings, preparing for his father’s memorial service. I was here with our children. I spent a great deal of time thinking of Peter’s father…about his steadfast spirit and dedication to his family. And how he and Ruth have always lived their lives with Grace. I also thought about how precious life is. And how I’m grateful for each and every moment we have with each other.
An avid scuba diver, the sea was a large part of Bill’s life. When Peter was a young boy, Bill used to sing a song to him about sailing and the sea. He passed his love of all things aquatic to Peter, who also became a scuba diver and joined the Sailing club in college. Peter will never forget one particular journey where he sailed in stormy seas, and even thought he might not make it back to shore. I saw this quote and thought it tied in beautifully to the topic of Grace.
Grace is there for us in the not-so-smooth waters during our voyage. I’m grateful for the days with glassy smooth water, and for the Grace that comes with the choppy seas.
I dedicate this post to Peter’s father, William Henry Howard. A man of Grace. You will be missed. And never forgotten.
I‘m Seleta, a city girl living the beach life with my husband, fabulous four offspring, happy horses and frisky fur babies. A former TV personality turned Designer, I love to share the sparkly side of life. Read more 
Want to follow the conversation? Subscribe to this post's comment feed.
Seleta, this post brought tears to my eyes. It was a beautiful post. My condolences to your family.
What a beautiful post, Seleta. Thank you so much for sharing. My condolences to you and your whole family.
What a beautiful, touching post, Seleta. After having read your blog for years now, grace is definitely one of the first words to come to mind when I think of you. Condolences to you, your husband and your family.
You have touched my heart in so many ways with this post. What a lovely tribute to your father-in-law! My deepest condolences to your whole family.
oh seleta.
much much love.
xoxo
Beautiful words from a beautiful woman — inside and outside. Prayers for you and your family.
Seleta,
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
I very much love knowing that this is the year of grace….
Grace be to you and your family~
pve
beautiful post, seleta. my condolences to you, peter, and your families. pam
What beautiful words as a tribute to your father-in-law. Prayers for you and your entire family. Thank you for this post. Your words pertaining to God’s grace were exactly what I needed to hear today!
What a beautiful post! Prayers are with your family during this sad time. May God bring you all peace that surpasses all understanding.
thank you for sharing the true meaning of grace with us. i trust that God will grant you much of it during this time. may the Lord who always holds us in His hands comfort your souls and lead you in the steps of His path.
What a beautiful post, Seleta. A good reminder of the nature of grace. And I love the photos of Peter’s parents! They look like movie stars :)
beautifully written. thank you for inspiring us in your moment of loss. our thoughts are with you. donna
Amazing words. I’ve always loved the word ‘grace’ and now I love it even more. I’m terribly sorry for your loss and my prayers go out to you and your family.
Happy Birthday!!
This is really beautiful! I love that picture of them together, young and in love. I’m so sorry for your loss.
My thoughts and prayers to your family Seleta. What a beautiful and very touching post. A lovely tribute to your father-in-law.
This is a beautiful tribe Seleta! What lovely insight into their lives, and the beautiful name “Grace”.
Those old photos are so beautiful! May your mother-in-law , your husband and your family find peace in all that is good, soon.
XO Nancy
Powellbrowerhome.com
Seleta, what a beautiful post. So, loving, caring and warm. A wonderful tribute to your father in law.
Love the pictures of your in-laws! They are priceless.
Happy belated birthday.
Big hugs!
Seleta,
What a joy it is to be able to honor someone because of the life they lived. Precious. If you are interested in going deeper in this concept of grace I would highly recommend you read the book “One Thousand Gifts” by Ann Voskamp. Like your daughter, my middle name is Grace and this book has deeply influenced how I look at grace, gifts, and thankfulness. Blessings!
Kelsey
kelseygracelantz@gmail.com
That was so beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing. Prayers going out to your family & a happy belated birthday as well :)
What a wonderful, poetic, and beautiful piece. Thanks for sharing.
My thought with you Seleta.Such a beautiful post.
Laurence
I too, must say this was a beautiful tribute to your Father in Law. I had tears
reading it to the very end. Lovely. With deepest Sympathy…from WI
May time ease the pain but not erase the memories! So sorry for your families loss.
Your post was a beautiful way to honor your father-in-law and share what you learned about GRACE
Thank you
This was such a beautiful testimony to God’s unbelievable grace. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. Also, your mother-in-law’s photo in her younger years, reminds me of you:) I pray peace for your husband and all of your family during this time.
Kathy
I think this may just be my favorite post yet! It is with tears that I write thank you for sharing. Our fifth child ( 5 years after husband’s [apparently unsuccessful] “snip”) could only be named GRACE. xo
this is a beautiful Beautiful, “I got tears in my eyes, never met the man but DID know him” kind of beautiful post.
I LOVE your last quote, I will be sharing it with many and it reminded me of my version ….the quote which gives me strength every day when I pass it on my fridge….
“Barn Burnt down…
…..Now I can see the Moon.”
Grace is Good…. and everything in between.
this was lovely.
Thank you for your words. The meaning of grace can seem so elusive, but I truly believe God allows us to experience it just when we need it the most. Many blessings to your family as you travel through the grief that follows the passing of a beautiful life.
So much I want to say. Beautiful photos of Bill and Ruth which say so much and such a loving tribute. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been during this last battle. May your memories comfort you and Peter and Ruth and your loved ones during this dark hour.
So much I want to say. Beautiful photos of Bill and Ruth which say so much and such a loving tribute. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been during this last battle. May your memories comfort you and Peter and Ruth and your loved ones during this dark hour.
This is such a beautiful tribute to what seems like a wonderful man. I’ve shared your thoughts with a friend who lost her husband earlier this year, and hoping she can also find comfort in the year of God’s Grace.
Anne Lamott says grace is the smell of pine through the cracks in a cabin floor after you’ve made a fool of yourself on the chair lift. It is there. It comes when you need it the most.
That was a lovely piece and the pictures were perfect.
I am so sorry for your loss, I know how difficult it is to lose a parent. What a lovely tribute to Peter’s father. Truly one of the most beautiful posts I’ve read in a really long time. xo
such a beautiful touching post. brought tears to my eyes.
my condolences to you and your family.
Seleta,
Thinking of you and your family. My prayers are with you all. May God’s grace carry you through this difficult time.
Debbi
Please let your husband and your Mother in law that they are in my prayers. I hope they believe that their loved one is now in a better place in God’s grace. Live each day fully not because it might be your last but it is the way to have a great life.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. That photo is priceless.
What a beautiful message! And those pictures are absolutely amazing…they are gifts to treasure!!
I pray for strength and comfort for all of you.
Seleta, I am really sorry for your family’s loss. My love to you all. You are in my thoughts and prayers. xx
So sorry for your loss – our prayers are with your family through this difficult time. Your post of remembrance was so beautiful and elegant. May you see each day as a blessing and embrace it as He wishes.
Thank you.
Condolences to you and your family during this difficult time..that sailor quote has a lovely sentiment..looks like the beach was a source of joy for your in laws and now for your family.
Take Care
What lovely words. Thank you.
seleta, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this loss. My daughter too is named Grace and you made me re-think the word and name I so love to mean so much more! Thank you! XO, Liza
What a beautiful couple. And a wonderful testament to loving and honoring one’s spouse. I will hug my husband a little tighter when he comes home from work tonight. Thank you for sharing and God bless you and your family.
This was so beautifully written. What a wonderful dedication to your husband’s father. Those pictures of he and his wife are absolutley stunning. It’s great to hear that they led such a full and giving life and really honored and cherished each other and the time they had together. So many lessons to take away from this. I’m sorry for your family’s loss and you’ll all certainly be in my thoughts and prayers.
So sorry for your families loss. This is a beautiful tribute ~ thoughts & prayers.
Seleta,
This is so lovely….an honorable tribute to your father in law and an inspiring gift to your readers.
The photos are absolutely adorable, thank you for sharing your story. God’s grace is always there for us, a gift that eases the difficult days we all must face.
My father has parkinson’s, he has had it for about 13 years now. I see how my parents are, yes he isnt the same man he was 20 years ago but he tries his best to do with the hand he has been given, and my poor sweet mother has endless patience and love. My prayers are with your family. Love what you said about Grace, I love that name and Im pregnant, its def. one of the names on the table.
Beautiful, beautiful tribute to your father in law. Thank you for the lesson about God’s grace. The reminder was much needed. Keep using your many gifts, Seleta.
Seleta- that could not have been more beautifully said. It’s very special that Peter and you have beautiful memories of his father. May God bless all of you and comfort you as you go on missing him.
xo-
Michelle
What a beautiful post & reminder of Grace. I wear Amazing Grace & Pure Grace perfume from Philosophy & love the reminders of Grace written on their bottles & products. May God pour his Grace on you & your family as you mourn the loss of your father-in-law. Such a beautiful post w/amazing photos that look like vintage coastal post cards. If only everyone could experience that kind of love for so many years. You are a gifted writer.
My condolences to you and your family. I think of receiving far greater than what we deserve when the word “grace” comes to mind. We live by God’s grace daily!
I am so sorry for your loss. Sounds like an amazing man. We’ll be praying for peace, joy and a plethora of memories to console you during this difficult time.
I lost my mother a decade ago…she was too young, and I still cannot believe I haven’t had the chance to ask her advice in so long. My consolation is in knowing that this life is but a blink of an eye and a bit a veil covered haze in comparison to the full and glorious (and illness free) reality to come. Heaven is forever and I can hardly wait for the reunion! Peace.
Seleta, that was so beautiful and heartfelt… It only confirms what a beautiful woman YOU are – inside and out.
Seleta, I am always impressed with your blog and the kind of life you lead. Even though you are beautiful, with an amazing home, fabulous family, and talents galore, I am alway most touched with your faith, committment, and natural grace. I’m sure you chose Peter and his family because they are the same – and you are lucky to have them as well. My condolences to Peter and to all of you. Thank you for sharing this story.
Thank you for this beautiful post.
I printed out this quote as a postcard about two weeks ago and have it in my book as a page reminder since then. Love it. Love the name Grace and the meaning of it – in German it does not sound so nice and cannot be used as a name. .(
What a wonderful tribute. The post – and your legacy with such a great family.
Well written! I love this post so much!
Beautiful post & blessings to your husband’s family! 2 years ago on July 16th my husband’s grandfather died — On July 17h we were married. His grandfather had been a huge part of his life growing up and it was so hard that he passed the day before our wedding. But his dad’s side of the family ALL came to the wedding and the reception even though they had just lost their father/grandpa. My husband’s grandmother was also in the hospital at the same time because she had a perferated ulcer that ruptured on the 16th when she had found out about her husband’s death.
You are right on when you say “And I can’t sit here and tell you growth is always fun”. I really agree — I gained a husband & a family on July 17th, but also lost a grandfather.
Such a lovely post, Seleta. Thank you for sharing this special part of your family’s life with us. The photos of Peter’s parents are gorgeous. I am so sorry for your loss and I know this amazing member of your family will be dearly missed. So glad you made many lovely memories together and thank you for sharing them with us. It is obvious that many of the best parts of Peter’s dad live on in all of you. What a wonderful legacy for a his wonderful life. xo, Tobi
Such a beautiful post. You are so much more than just the sparkly side of life. May Peter’s Dad rest in peace. He sounds like an amazing man. I am very sorry for the loss your family is experiencing and I will keep them in my prayers.
I realize I’m a little late in my response to your post but this post hit home too much to not comment. Sorry to hear about the loss in your family but WOW what an amazing ministry your openness is in sharing what God has reveled to you. Pray that Grace abounds in your family the rest of 2012!